What's the most serious crime you got away with?

Conspiracy to commit terrorism and like 10 other offenses involving conspiracy to traffic firearms.

I had straight sex once on mushrooms, ecstacy and ketamine, also cialis because mdma kills my boner, felt like we were spaceships full of strange lifeforms docking into each other. Good times.

i feel like most of the half dozen or so times i've had sex on psychedelics it went pretty normally albeit vivid, but the one time i remember my gf and i were listening to weird music and we started making funny noises at each other, like blowing raspberries and making farm animal noises and going AWOOOGA like a fog horn

ah. thank you for that memory anon. simpler times.
oh also one time that girl pooped herself on coke lol. she just threw away her underwear and kept it moving, didn't even mention it until hours later, like a professional.

the weirdest kind of hardship posting lol

hahahahahah hell yeah dude

i imagined awooga sex but also she wasn't tripping just me... we'd been dating off and on and known each other a long time but she was starting to turn into a bitch
part of me thinks maybe it was like some kind of pussy infection making my dick sting another part thinks it was the LSD sensing her bad vibes and preventing me from imprinting on her/falling in love by having kino LSD sex
regardless i stuck it in and raised an eyebrow and she asked what was going on and i just said "it hurts" and pulled my pants up and went back to listening to records

I evaded bus fare in elmentary school

Being racist online

It's not technically a crime, because I was under 14 years old and therefore criminally irresponsible in Spain, but when I was 5 years old I pushed another kid in a playground and he broke his neck with the fall. He died, obviously

you won

I had sex with black and brown girls

usurping economies

Holy shit I hope it's bs

Once farted on the bus.
Now kill yourself fed

I left a salt shaker lid loose at a restaurant

Holy shit I hope it was a nigger

Probably killed someone but I can't tell if the memory is real or schizo

It isn't really a crime, but I stabbed the shit out of some Nigerian who tried to steal my phone. Cops didn't even take him to the hospital. I saw him in the station while giving my statement, and he saw me and immediately started screeching about racism and how he dindu nuffin, how he's dying (he wasn't; I just tooled him up with a Leatherman knife). The Coloured cop said Hou jou bek and slapped him on the back of his simian head.

Accidentally not paying for a magazine i mistook for paper advertisement.

Rape and murder

Actual glownigger thread

Probably using the self checkout to buy food at a discount. When they were new there were many discounts and secret discounts that they didnt tell us about. I saved a substantial amount of money!

Otherwise using very much proscribed hard drugs to self medicate for my undiagnosed autism/ocd/adhd clusterfucked brain and to stay sane when im black pilled.

Antisemitism/racism online

I upper decked the toilet of Shiloh, KY last week with a chinese parasite infection and have likely infected thousands with this bioweapon, enjoy the next 3 days

I got boosted to plat in league

Kek

oh shit Shiloh Ky actually exist no I wasnt there and have no ass worms sorry

No. I was very young and I doubt I knew I was going to kill him, or even what death is. I guess that's why I don't feel remorse either. In any case it was only once, so it's okay

Not at all, my parents had to compensate the kid's parents

I shot JFK

Numerous firearms related crimes that would make the ATF seethe. Fully automatic mega crimes. Heinous

I stole 8 bottles of robitussin like 15 years ago and then astrally projected til next sunday.

Why did he say "racism" ?

As a white guy in America I was able to make it to the 1% despite all the trillions of dollars thrown at me to fail.

Waiting for mossad to kick my door in right now.

wanking in school

hey mr honeypot nigger, I am a smooth criminal

because its a modern "magical spell"

I smuggled terrabytes of gay porn into saudi arabia

we were having a rock fight between 2 groups of boys in first year high school. one of the rocks i threw hit a kid in the temple and put him in hospital for a day, and it burst a blood vessel in his eye so had to stay at home for a week.

they all blamed this feral kid Liam who had multiple suspensions at school who was a shoplifter, thief, smoked and drank at school.

I dunno if it was the final straw that got him expelled, or the 2nd last. but either way it helped him get expelled. even though i know that it was the rock that i threw that actually hit him.

I map and create routeways into israel for muslim migrants

Beating the shit out of a kike while calling it a kike.

I went 2, fuck you cunt.

I was a poop bandit in our school. I not just got away with it but framed a cat raping ugly psycho girl. now she is a dr and im collecting neetbux. it all worked out foine

In desperation, he thought it might win him a ticket to freedom. Not even the black cops were fooled.

I drop pieces of bacon around musques and synagogues. I even glue coins to the ground near satanist jew temples.

I was once spelunking in Saudia Arabia and testing my desert camo gear when all of a sudden two faggots started having sex near me. It was so awkward I just stayed hidden but I'm pretty sure that's a crime there too.

I drop laxatives into indian street food merchant bowls. so far nobody noticed it.

I was asking because when I worked in Germany with a lot of nogs, they would accuse each other of racism. Because they were from different African countries. They should learn words like xenophobia, chauvinism, etc.

You're white ?

They were going to have diarrhea anyway, you just wasted pills.

I still do this.
*brofist*

I leave 'no dogs, no women in skimpy outfits, this is a muslim neighbourhood. please respect our boundaries' flyers in german cities.

I doubt there's ever any non-White Saffas here.

I smoked a joint once. I had panic attack and diarrhea and spent a week in hospital. I will never do crime again.

They should learn words like xenophobia, chauvinism, etc.

What for? It's not like they will use them in the right context, all they and their peers will remember is to use it when they "feel" discriminated. Just put em back to afrika, or israel, I don't care.

I am a hamburger artist at a popular restaurant. For muslims and jews I always give pig meat. Jews always get suspicious so I had to settle with a 30% pig - 65% beef 5% dishwasher grime mixture.

This reminds me of a time in primary school when we were going for a walk as a class, me and a few friends were hanging back throwing rocks around. One kid, this ginger who was my friend but also a know it all and pretty annoying yet not malicious in the slightest threw a stone and it hit this sweet little girl in the head. She was okay but obviously crying. God, its painful to think about. I went to high school with her too, she was extremely shy but got good grades. I looked her up on facebook earlier this year and shes super cute, married to some handsome white (normal) guy and is a scientist.

I called my assigned GCHQ operative the n-word through a channel that I knew for a fact he couldn't track. He knew it was me, but couldn't prove it. You still can't, Olusegun. Seethe more.

wasting perfectly good pork on heebs

Just put a Jewish meat tax on them. Make it 50% vegetarian.

Yeah, too bad you're giving them german passports instead of deporting them. Amazon and DHL workers are 90% nogs and arabs.

I have a white girlboss diarrhea business. My main customers are lower socioeconomic background saudis. They want proof of ethically sourced halal diarrhea, so I pay pocketchange to gypsy girls to record them shitting, then I swap the shit to my pork sausage special right outta my anushole and deliver them that. I have 4.8star rating.

Yes, I know, that's why I wouldn't help a politician, journalist, lawyer or judge, if they became a crime statistic right in front of me.

My sister worked for a small food processing company founded and run by a famous Australian chef(?). She found out that they were using a byproduct of pigs in their gelatine used in halal and kosher marked foods. She said something to the manager who got freaked out but asaik nothing changed hahaha

To me, White South Africans are heroic people. And you will all be considered as such in the next 10-15 years. The canary in the coal mine. Unironically I would help any South African that wants to come to Europe.

my face is very youthful and feminine, I dress up in drag, then go to abortion clinics and destroy their toilets. I flush down cement, I paint the wall with my shit, then I leave in a hurry.

Wouldn't you like to know!

based aussie chef

lol send ammo instead, thanks bro

No comment

Posesion of drugs
Breaking into National theatre in Warsaw
Choking a guy
Drink driving
Many others i dont remember

Unironically I would help any South African that wants to come to Europe.

I'm keen to visit a mate of mine working in Amsterdam, next year, if you'd like to helping the needful redeem air ticket, somehow.

Are orbeez effective at destroying toilets?

I posted on Anon Babble once

depends on the toilet and piping but they do a decent job I assume. nothing beats cement.

Anon's hymen broke

you can't get away from serious crimes, retard OP
i.e. if you murder someone, the CIA glow niggers are gonna be looking for you

vanilla shit. did coke for a year. drove drunk a couple of dozen times. petty vandalism here and there when I was an angsty teenager

wtf pedro

Admitting to a crime on here would be as crazy as confessing directly to a police officer that you strangled a hitch hiker named Trudy in an overgrown ditch off a dirt road about 6 miles south of Tellico Plains in 1997! You'd have to be a MAD MAN

Fucking a 17 y/o femboy trans boy i miss him so fucking much he was beautiful and sweet and adorable and kind :(

I stole a paperclip from an hospital when I was 5 or 6 years old. Didn't sleep for a couple of weeks. Felt extremely guilty over it.

Found the case, lol. My bad, it wasn't a Niggerian, but Coongalese.

I used to be a CD bootlegger in high school. People would pay me 2 euros to download and burn on a CD-R whatever album they wanted.

Also assault and battery, tax evasion in 3 countries, incitement to hatred and jaywalking.

didn't pay for the bus ticket for 2 stops SOMEONE STOP ME

about a thousand instances of lolocaust denial

Based, same, I used to sell movies and music and games in from 3rd grade and on. I was making cash.

Stab someone

They don't go to the morgue

They don't even go to the hospital

Doing it wrong, typical africoid

I'm not copping to jack shit other than the shoplifting. That is one thing niggers have over Whites they don't have a sex fetish for snitching each other out over things they do not understand.

Tresor Nase

honourary jew?

Saving the world

Kek. I blame my tool/weapon. And to be fair, I believe it did eventually wind up at a hospital. Thankfully not a morgue, because that would be a huge hassle for me.

I'm just fucking with you. Good job for stabbing a nigger without any consequence, it's a feeling not everyone gets to experience. You stand among the chosen few, be proud. Do you still have the shank?

Having sex with an unmarried woman in Indonesia.
Burning my parents alive.
Stealing bread rolls in the bakery.

Smoking blunts as I drove thru every state in the Confederacy.

delivering pounds of grass across state lines (didnt smoke blunts during this obvously)

street racing and hitting muh limiter

running from the police

tax evasion

sex in public

drugs in public

weed, lsd ( a LOT of lsd), shrooms(trash), opiates (trash), nootropics like modafinil (god tier), adderall (too god tier)

Do you still have the shank?

Ja I named it Pendragon Kaffirbane and it sits retired on my shelf, now. I was sure the cops would keep it as evidence, but they basically said hang on to it, and they stopped writing when I started telling them about how I used it. From that, I understood not to mention it again.
As far as cops go, they were good ones.

Reported to Sicurezza Interna. Make sure to use the time you have left in this world well.

Accidentally taking a pen from a store

I dnt commit crimes because I already know managers usually suspect me all the time (my last name is Italian so they always expect me to be doing something)

I'm a war criminal and i got away with it

that is praised in jewish torah law. or are you talking goyim law?

I'm not sure that creature even knows what a jew is.

I did that in canada. shot at a few too about a decade ago. how long is statute of limitations in canada? asking for a friend. some glownigger in this thread should know the answer to that question.

I shot JFK

Rock paper scissors to decide

Average Hungarian moment

how long is statute of limitations in canada?

No such thing exists for murder.

Always remember: A thing doesn't become a secret unless at least two people know of it. You told the whole world on a fed-monitored clown stage. Haha. You're fucked. Anticrime AI will attribute every dead nigger in your general area a decade ago to you now. I hope you have an alibi for all of them.

No need, there was more than one shooter.

Forgot to tip my AIPAC guy. Still haunts me

tőplél

How fed-monitored do you think this place actually is? I don't think it's nearly as monitored as most of you seem to assume. I almost pity the pig who has to scroll through pages and pages of shitposts and anime faggotry, on the remote chance that he comes across something chargeable, that they can actually do something about.

Nigger

Man that has to be like a felony in Germany

Data mining glownigger thread.
Herbs

Holocaust denial.

nice try, glownigger

Owning a folding knife longer than 2.25 inches

Holocaust enjoyment

I ripped the tag off my mattress

I downloaded a movie once

I visited the UK and made a racist comment on twitter. By the time the police started looking for me, I was long gone.

That's not how it works. That scrolling is robot work.

Web scrapers archive everything without exception, then a text processor looks for keywords, or if more modern, for actual leads. All automated. Contrary to common belief, nothing on Anon Babble is anonymous, every post can be linked to a suspect file with a face, a home address, a threat profile. It's trivial, really. Only when that automated system gives an alarm, a human operator checks that post and either dismisses it or excalates the case. A few years from now, that human operator will no longer be necessary because a robot that costs 1/10th of the operator can make the decision 10000 times faster..

I wanna buy some pre-paid credit card from ~le derp webz w/ bitcoin, then buy more bitcoin with said credit card and then buy supposed real money (dollars) with it. Would could go wrong, hypothetically? If this goes right, this is the infinite money hack. Hypothetically, of course.

I called a tranny a man

Interdasting, thanks for educating me Anon.

That one where I didn’t have my phone with me.

I've only ever done illegal stuff in minecraft

Put a jew in office

eating all of santa's cookies

i wrote "kill shitwood" on some chinese forum

Data mining thread

Full of faggots

Average Tuesday

Stole my sisters panties off her while she was sleeping

jeez dood

When I was an altar boy I molested a priest

Probably growing mushrooms and weed in my apartment years ago. Not for sale, just personal use.
I actually got really lucky once because I had to leave town for a few days and left the lights on a timer. The ballast shit the bed while I was gone and probably would’ve started a fire had it not been built with that failsafe fire-retardant ooze shit I can’t remember the name of atm.

farted in some american's sister's panties while she was sleeping

i almost got convicted for murder

You actually did a lot of damage to society doing that. How do you live with yourself?

we could like meet up and I would show you all my illegal drugs, explosives and Sensitive goverment data I got by social engineering DEI hires.

murder.
i killed some jews, cremated them and erased all traces of the remains so well. that no evidence of it has been discovered to this day.
like
it
never
even
happened

Well, today I told a fed that he was a COMPLETE FAGGOT

downloading free porn when I was 12

You won't get away with this.

Good morning officer. You sure do look cute in those tight pants, cupcake.
xoxoxoxox

How did his parents react? (You were supervised, right?)

I'm basically a serial litterbug. If I don't see any cars around, all trash in my car is going out the window. Sometimes I let the garbage in my car mount up just so I can dump it all out at once.

I killed jfk

Nice try

Free thinking high iq individuals.

imported weed seeds for some bitch who claimed she never received them

That's right goy tell us your crimes on Anon Babble
It's not a trap! You'll be fine!

I touched a butt once and stole a sleeping bag from a camping store

you're a nigger

piracy

You'll be fine!

I literally will be. I committed arson in 2022. I JFK'd your mom in 2023. Any fed want to try sort fact from fiction here? My body is ready.
Ya'll niggers too scurred.

I just remembered than when I was 6 or something I threw a big fucking rock to a niglet in a park kek.

downloaded a car

I JAYWALKED ONCE IN JUNIOR HIGH

OH AND I CAME IN YOUR MOM'S ASSHOLE AND YOUR DAD DIDN'T KNOW

I dropped an ice cream cone in a US mail box when I was 8. Probably destroyed someone's welfare cheque or a court order or something.

does rape count?

I hope you get the chair, filth

was consoonsaul or nah ?

someone post the guy who fucked up his entire towns sewer with orbeez
I think he was French

I did probably 10k+ of damage to a parked Mercedes and just kept driving. Shouldn't park expensive cars on the street, not my problem.

In highschool I'm pretty sure I killed someone driving home.

Lived in rural area and this guy just jogs out from the trees, I slammed my brakes on and can see his face giving the "OH FUCK" face. Wham. He flew like 3-4 feet, I panick and get out "ARE YOU OK?" and I can tell he's fucked up. He looks up at me with blood coming out of one of his eyes and says if you don't reply to this thread your favorite pet cat will get feline aids.

Nigger faggot

After a teacher flunked me I found out where he lives, snuck into his house and stabbed him in his sleep. Noone ever found out.

sell cocaine a couple of times, I also fuck hookers but you can't get jailed for that only a fine

benchod

Raping you mom and creating you, Elgin fed nigger

I think white people are good people

Drove through a red light in the wrong lane towards incoming traffic to get where I was going to faster.

flicking the bean of my sister while she was sleeping

Lmao
Based ik ook

Hot

nooooo it's a trap
Jannie ban this fucker

Hello mr fed.

I stole a Kinder egg from a gas station when I was 7

capital offense, actually

assault on a police officer

my lawyer plead it down to some horseshit charge and i got 3 years probation and heavy fines

3 murders

wouldn't you like to know, glownigger.

nice try, faggot

I am not at liberty to say. But don't worry, he swore himself he would never ever do that sort of thing ever again in his life. To not give in and be subordinate to bizarre desires like that ever again. He felt bad about it for 8 or 9 mts. But after not being captured or detected, the feeling sad over the act lost it's deterrent value you could say.

"It could all be justified!"

Rationalizations that aren't rational

Justifications that are not just

Denial is a really funny thing like that.